Top 12 'Calm-on-Cue' Relaxation Techniques to explore for beginners with a forever-excited pup - Goh Ling Yong
Ah, the puppy phase. It’s a magical, whirlwind time filled with fluffy cuddles, tiny needle teeth, and a boundless, chaotic energy that seems to defy the laws of physics. One minute they’re an adorable sleeping angel, the next they’re a four-legged tornado ricocheting off the furniture. If you’ve ever looked at your forever-excited pup and thought, "Is there an off-switch I haven't found yet?"—you are not alone.
This constant buzz of energy, while a hallmark of a healthy, happy pup, can be exhausting for us humans. It can make training feel impossible, quiet evenings a distant memory, and simply co-existing a challenge. But here’s the secret: calming down is a skill. It’s not something most puppies are born with; it's something we have to patiently and proactively teach them. The goal isn't to squash their joyful spirit, but to show them that there's a time for play and a time for peace.
That's where the concept of "Calm-on-Cue" comes in. Instead of just trying to manage the chaos, we can empower our dogs with the ability to self-soothe and relax. It's one of the greatest gifts you can give your high-energy companion (and your own sanity!). We're going to dive into 12 practical, beginner-friendly techniques to help you and your pup find your zen together. Let’s get started.
1. Master the Art of 'Capturing Calmness'
This is the cornerstone of all relaxation training, and it's beautifully simple. The idea is to notice and reward the moments when your puppy chooses to be calm on their own, without you asking for it. Did they just lie down with a sigh? Did they settle at your feet while you watched TV? These are golden opportunities.
The key is how you reward them. If you jump up excitedly and say "Good dog!" you'll likely undo the very calmness you're trying to encourage. Instead, have some treats ready in a quiet pouch or a nearby bowl. When you spot a moment of calm, calmly walk over, say a soft marker word like "Yes" or "Nice," and gently place a treat between their paws. No fuss, no fanfare.
You are essentially "capturing" the calm behavior and telling your dog, "This. This right here is what I love." Over time, your pup will start to offer these calm behaviors more frequently, realizing that settling down earns them good things. It's a powerful, non-confrontational way to build a foundation of relaxation.
2. Teach a Reliable 'Settle' Cue
While capturing calmness is passive, teaching a 'Settle' cue is active. This involves teaching your dog to go to a specific spot—like a bed, mat, or crate—and lie down calmly. This gives you a tool to use when you need them to relax, like when guests come over or during family meal times.
Start by making the 'settle spot' fantastic. Use a comfy bed or mat. Lure your pup onto it with a high-value treat. As soon as all four paws are on the mat, mark ("Yes!") and reward. Repeat this several times. Once they are eagerly getting on the mat, start asking for a 'down'. Lure them into a down position on the mat, then mark and reward.
The next step is building duration. Start with just a second or two, then gradually increase the time they must stay on the mat before getting their reward. Release them with a clear cue like "Okay!" or "Free!" This teaches them that their job is to stay put until you say otherwise. 'Mat work' creates a predictable safe space where the only expectation is to relax.
3. Explore a Simplified Relaxation Protocol
Dr. Karen Overall’s Relaxation Protocol is a renowned, structured program designed to teach dogs to remain calm through a series of increasingly distracting human behaviors. While the full 15-day protocol can seem daunting, you can borrow its core principles for a simplified, DIY version.
The premise is this: you ask your dog to 'settle' on their mat, and then you perform a series of simple actions. You might start by just sitting in a chair next to them for 5 seconds. Then you might stand up and sit down. Then you might clap your hands once, walk a circle around them, or lightly jog in place.
For each step, the dog's job is to remain lying down and calm. If they succeed, they get a reward. If they get up, that's okay—no scolding! You just reset and try an easier version of the task. This process systematically desensitizes them to movement and sound, teaching them that their mat is a place of unwavering calm, no matter what's happening around them.
4. Unleash the Power of Licking and Chewing
Have you ever noticed how focused and content a dog is when working on a bone or a frozen treat? That's because the repetitive actions of licking and chewing are inherently soothing for dogs. They trigger the release of endorphins, which are natural, feel-good chemicals in the brain that reduce stress.
This is an easy win for any puppy owner. Instead of feeding your pup their meals from a bowl in 30 seconds, use that food to your advantage. Stuff it into a Kong or a similar puzzle toy and freeze it. This turns a 30-second meal into a 20-minute calming activity. LickiMats are another fantastic tool; smear them with dog-safe peanut butter, plain yogurt, or canned pumpkin and let your pup lick their way to a calmer state.
Pro Tip: Always supervise your pup with new chews to ensure they are enjoying them safely. Long-lasting chews like bully sticks, beef tendons, or coffee wood can provide a fantastic outlet for a busy mouth and mind.
5. Go on a 'Sniffari' Decompression Walk
Not all walks are created equal. We often get caught up in the idea of a walk as physical exercise—a brisk, structured heel where the goal is to cover distance. While those have their place, a "decompression walk" or "sniffari" serves a different, crucial purpose: mental decompression.
For these walks, use a long line (15-20 feet) in a safe area like a park, field, or quiet trail. The goal is to let your dog lead the way. Let them stop and sniff a single blade of grass for five minutes. Let them follow a scent trail, zig-zagging wherever their nose takes them. Your only job is to keep them safe and follow along.
A dog's primary sense is their smell. Allowing them to use their nose freely is like letting us read a fascinating book or watch a great movie. It’s deeply enriching and mentally tiring in the best possible way. A 20-minute sniffari can be more exhausting and calming for an anxious or overexcited pup than a 40-minute forced march.
6. Engage Their Brain with Nose Work
Building on the power of sniffing, you can bring scent-based enrichment indoors. Nose work games are an incredible way to channel your pup's energy into a focused, problem-solving task. A tired brain leads to a relaxed body.
The simplest game is "Find It." Start by showing your pup a smelly treat in your hand. Say "Find it!" and toss the treat a few feet away. When they eat it, praise them. After a few reps, make it slightly harder. Place them in a 'stay' (or have someone hold them) and hide the treat just around a corner or under the edge of a rug while they watch. Release them with "Find It!"
As they get better, you can hide treats all over a room without them watching. You can also invest in tools like a snuffle mat (a fabric mat with fleece strips for hiding food) or puzzle toys. These activities satisfy their natural instincts to forage and work for their food.
7. Introduce Calming Touch & TTouch Massage
Touch is a powerful communication tool. While we love to give our pups excited pats and ruffles, a calming, intentional touch can do wonders for settling their nervous system. This isn't just petting; it's a mindful practice.
Find a quiet time when your pup is already relatively relaxed. Sit with them and use long, slow, steady strokes along the length of their body, from neck to tail. Keep your pressure consistent and moderate. Avoid fast, choppy petting, which can be arousing. Pay attention to their body language—a soft sigh, leaning into your hand, or sleepy eyes are all good signs.
You can also explore Tellington TTouch (TTouch), a specific method of gentle bodywork. One of the easiest and most effective TTouches is the "Ear Slide." Gently hold your pup's ear between your thumb and forefinger and slowly slide from the base to the tip. Repeat this several times on both ears. The ear has numerous acupressure points, and this technique is known to be incredibly calming for many dogs.
8. Make Their Mat a Magical Place
We talked about teaching a 'Settle' cue, but we can take this a step further by making their mat or bed the single best place in the entire house. The goal is for your dog to choose to go there on their own because they associate it with wonderful, calming things.
This technique, often called "mat work," involves building an incredibly strong positive association. Start by feeding your dog their meals on their mat. When you give them a super high-value chew, like a frozen Kong or a bully stick, it only happens on the mat. Randomly walk by and drop a delicious treat on their mat throughout the day, without saying a word.
Soon, you'll find your pup offering to go to their mat, hoping something amazing will happen. This creates a powerful self-soothing station. When they feel a bit overwhelmed or antsy, they have a default location they can go to where they know how to behave and have learned to relax.
9. Play the 'Look at That' (LAT) Game
Is your puppy’s excitement often triggered by things in the environment—a passing car, another dog, a person walking by the window? The "Look at That" (LAT) game, developed by trainer Leslie McDevitt, is a game-changer for this. It helps rewire your dog's brain from "OMG A THING, I MUST REACT!" to "Oh, a thing. I should check in with my human."
Start in a low-distraction environment. The moment your dog looks at a trigger (at a safe distance where they aren't reacting), click or say "Yes!" and immediately give them a high-value treat. The timing is crucial: you mark the moment their eyes are on the trigger, but the reward comes from you.
After several repetitions, you'll see a magical shift. Your dog will see the trigger, and then their head will whip back around to look at you, anticipating the reward. You've taught them that the trigger is a cue to check in with you, turning a moment of potential over-arousal into a moment of calm focus.
10. Implement Structured Downtime & Enforced Naps
This might be the most overlooked and impactful tip on the list. Puppies, like human toddlers, get overtired. And when they get overtired, they don't just get sleepy—they get frantic, bitey, and hyperactive. They often don't have the self-awareness to put themselves down for a nap.
This is where you, the benevolent leader, step in. Observe your pup's patterns. Most puppies can only handle being awake for 60-90 minutes before they need a nap. After a session of play, training, and a potty break, it's time for structured downtime. As my mentor Goh Ling Yong often emphasizes for building a healthy routine, a well-rested puppy is a trainable puppy.
Guide them to their crate or a puppy-proofed pen with a favorite chew. Cover the crate to reduce stimulation and play some quiet music. At first, they might fuss, but they will almost certainly crash and get the restorative sleep they desperately need. Enforced naps aren't punishment; they are a crucial part of meeting your puppy's biological needs and preventing overtired chaos.
11. Use Classical Conditioning with Scents & Sounds
You can create a powerful "calm-on-cue" trigger using scent or sound through classical conditioning. The idea is to pair a neutral stimulus (a specific scent or piece of music) with the state of being calm, so that eventually, the stimulus itself helps to elicit a calm response.
Choose a specific, unique scent that your dog doesn't encounter regularly. A dog-safe essential oil like lavender or chamomile, diluted and placed on their bedding, works well. Or, choose a specific album of calming classical music or a "Through a Dog's Ear" playlist.
The key is to only introduce this scent or music when your dog is already naturally calm and relaxed—during a massage, while they're sleeping, or when they're working on a chew. Don't play it when they're hyped up. Over weeks of association, their brain will link that sound or smell with a feeling of deep relaxation. You can then use it strategically before a potentially stressful event, like a car ride or having visitors.
12. Practice the '1-2-3' Pattern Game
Here's another brilliant game from Leslie McDevitt that gives your dog’s busy brain a simple, predictable, and calming pattern to follow. It's incredibly easy to teach and is a wonderful tool to use when you need to help your pup focus in a mildly distracting environment.
Get some small, tasty treats. In a calm voice, say "One," pause, "Two," pause, "Three." Immediately after you say "Three," give your dog a treat. That's it. Repeat this pattern over and over. "One... two... three... [treat]." "One... two... three... [treat]."
Your pup will quickly learn the pattern. The predictability is soothing for them. It gives their brain a simple job: listen for the numbers and anticipate the treat on "three." You can use this while waiting at the vet, if a stranger is approaching on your walk, or any time you need to interrupt a cycle of escalating excitement and bring their focus back to you.
Finding Your Calm, Together
Teaching a high-energy puppy to relax is a marathon, not a sprint. It’s a process of patiently building skills, managing their environment, and strengthening your bond. Remember that every training session, every captured moment of calm, and every snuffle mat you prepare is a deposit in your relationship bank.
Don't get discouraged if you have hyper days—they will happen! The goal is progress, not perfection. Pick one or two of these techniques that resonate with you and start there. Celebrate the small victories: the first unsolicited 'settle' on the mat, the sigh during a massage, the choice to chew a toy instead of your ankle.
You are giving your forever-excited pup an incredible life skill—the ability to find peace in our busy human world. And in the process, you'll find a bit more peace for yourself, too.
Which of these techniques are you most excited to try with your pup? Do you have any other go-to calming tips that have worked wonders? Share your stories and successes in the comments below!
About the Author
Goh Ling Yong is a content creator and digital strategist sharing insights across various topics. Connect and follow for more content:
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